Sunday, October 12, 2008

sigh...life sucks tired of living...

haihh things kept change eventually...i dono why...i hope too much i want too much...
thats why i get sooooo much of disapoinment...haihh
dono wat is this feeling and my mind is really messed up...feeling also messed up...just to sighing every moment...

worrying dat i will become the time again...the most downward time of me...just like the darkness is beside me...everything i see is all whole darkness...everything is dark and all i hope is light....dear u are only my light i wanted to be...all i wanted is u...

life...im getting so tired of...wats about life??i dont really understand...i just felt that i wana blow off my farking head...just end my farking life...and dont really hope to living in this beautiful world...i really wana gave up everything include i living in this world...felt the soul in my body gonna go away again...why why??!!i getting weaker and weaker...and wana cry...just cant help....IM FUCKING WEAK!!haihh why letting me living in this world...cant take it anymore...

yea parent born me to learn...become good...but they dont feel good to me...i mean they doesnt feel im good...ppl feel dat im good...sigh...yea they disappointed...its killing me...

all i wanted dat feel end this life all of sudden...and doesnt feel and hurts...pains anymore...too much of heartache to take...hey im not gonna suicide ok...lol anyone can "donate" to my head a 50caliber?? or 5.56caliber larh....haihh
how nice if the speed 200kmh i hit that day and just boom like that...nice huh??just a sec then boom...no need to think...heartbeat 100 straight to 0....yea....sighh
too tired to live....






ps...i love u...and i love u all my friends...

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